I've been absolutely inundated with emails requesting photos from the wedding I was at exactly one month ago. This wedding, you will recall, was between Lamb and the UK's premier milk baron family. I did take a camera with me and even took a few photos, which were invariably all rubbish; fortunately, there was a professional present, and fairly recently all the wedding photos were put online. The website didn't permit the saving of these images to file, because they are "copyright" of the photographer, or some baloney, but by pressing the Print Screen button I have bypassed all this.
There were hundreds of photos to choose from, mostly of the married couple, but I have carefully selected the cream of crop (i.e. photos with me, plus someone with tartan trousers). Thank the Lord none of the photos of people dancing featured me, especially during the latter stages.
After the church, we all went to the wedding reception hall, pictured here, which also happened to be the bride's family home. This was only revealed to me some time after. First I was a little surprised, which was then replaced by a deep, searing jealousy - why can't I marry a milk baron?
This is another view of their home. It's almost as nice as my Market Street flat.
Here's a photo of the rutting wedding "stags". Listen to us roar! They wouldn't allow me to take centre stage, instead getting the groom to stand there. That's why I'm the only one not smiling.
Here's everyone at the wedding. How many people do you recognise?
Check out the guy in the tartan trousers. He's the guy in the red box (which I drew in myself - it wasn't in the original shot). Only a very rich man or my grandfather can get away with wearing tartan trousers like these, and he's certainly not my grandfather.
Unbeknownst to myself, the photographer chose to take a sly, arty photo of me, pondering some thoughts over a champagne. But I think I look a little odd in this picture.
Later on at the wedding, I found this giant cat. Look at it!
(in other news: I get free from this rig on Wednesday - confirmed.)